F**k you too!

Status updates ...

... they're a touchy subject. Some people think status updates in social media are childish timewasters (the Twitter naysayers), others think they're a valuable and fun way to keep our networks updated.

I like them.

But I don't like swearing in status updates.

I'm getting a growing number of Facebook friends who feel the need to vent, using every expletive, on their Facebook status updates. And frankly, it's leaving me feeling kind of soiled. I'm reading updates like:

• f*#k sick of people f*#kn jerking me around. say what you mean!


• i hate fat f#*k bitches throwing their weight around trying to tell me what the f#$k to do with my life. get outta my face!!


• why is life always so F#$kn hard? i need a f#$kn holiday now

You get my drift ... [and yes, I am as offended by double exclamation marks as I am by the cussing].

Now, many of you will begin wondering about my friends. I have to put it on record: the majority are fab, wholesome go-getters who - although occasionally drinking themselves into oblivion on a Friday night after a hard week at the office - wouldn't swear on their status updates and are altogether 'clean cut and law abiding'. They know the thin line between having a Facebook profile that your buddies see, and having a Facebook profile that's visible to 1) your potential future employers and 2) your dear sweet old granny.

However, I've connected with a small amount of old, old friends ... the ones I went to primary school and high school with for example. And some have gone in weird and wonderful directions, with divorces, mid life crises and so on. And they DO like to say f#$k the world.

I'm no prude. I say f##k it all the time. When something surprises me, I say f##k me! But I don't feel a need to use the ol qwerty keyboard and share it with Facebook friends young and old.

There's a Facebook forum on this topic. [Of course there is, I hear you say]. I think popular opinion swings my way ...

Recently, I had to ditch an old acquaintance. I couldn't take her angry, cursing status updates anymore. It was clear her life had turned sour and she was using Facebook as a forum for a continuing argument with people unknown ... But for me, this friend was yelling at me. She was swearing at me. I couldn't take it anymore. And I clicked on the ol' 'Remove Friend" button. Adios.

And f##k you, too.